I remember our Pastor says that avoid all extremes. Extreme emotions, love, affection, rage, anger, sanity, insanity, etc, anything you could think of from positive to negative emotion, and whatever extreme emotion one could posses and accidentally acquired through his/her environment should have, he said that at least make reservation for ourselves and to others as well. The wisdom behind these are really simple, to somehow keep ourselves from hurt and/or pain, it maybe self-inflicted or accident it can hurt us.
Avoiding extremes and or at least put a margin to prevent you from getting to the edge thus keep you safer and less risk.
Whatever extreme things you experiencing right now, give a just-a-thought or put it in your things to ponder activity this coming new year!
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
my temporary WORK
Thursday, May 10, 2012
"The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman
"The Five Love Languages" Can Help You Connect With One Another
Dr. Gary Chapman, Christian counselor and author of The Five Love Languages (Compare Prices), writes about the importance of being able to express love to your spouse in a way that your spouse can understand. He calls this type of communicating using the five love languages.
Chapman's Five Emotional Love Languages:
Words of Affirmation
This is when you say how nice your spouse looks, or how great the dinner tasted. These words will also build your mate's self image and confidence.
Quality Time
Some spouses believe that being together, doing things together and focusing in on one another is the best way to show love. If this is your partner's love language, turn off the TV now and then and give one another some undivided attention.
Gifts
It is universal in human cultures to give gifts. They don't have to be expensive to send a powerful message of love. Spouses who forget a birthday or anniversary or who never give gifts to someone who truly enjoys gift giving will find themselves with a spouse who feels neglected and unloved.
Acts of Service
Discovering how you can best do something for your spouse will require time and creativity. These acts of service like vacuuming, hanging a bird feeder, planting a garden, etc., need to be done with joy in order to be perceived as a gift of love.
Physical Touch
Sometimes just stroking your spouse's back, holding hands, or a peck on the cheek will fulfill this need.
Determining Your Own Love Language
Since you may be speaking what you need, you can discover your own love language by asking yourself these questions:
How do I express love to others?
What do I complain about the most?
What do I request most often?
Speaking in your spouse's love language probably won't be natural for you. Dr. Chapman says, "We're not talking comfort. We're talking love. Love is something we do for someone else. So often couples love one another but they aren't connecting. They are sincere, but sincerity isn't enough."
Emotional Experiences
The number one emotional experience reported by folks is feeling the presence of God in their lives. The emotional high of being in love (which generally lasts around 2 years) is the second highest emotional experience that people reportedly have.
That is why it can be so difficult to try and talk some sense into someone who is in the midst of falling in love. Chapman stated that obsessive love can render people mentally incompetent. "There's not much difference between being in love and being insane."
Fading Tingle and Empty Love Tanks
After the first or second year of marriage, when the initial "tingle" is starting to fade, many couples find that their "love tanks" are empty. They may have been expressing love for their spouse, but in reality they may have been speaking a different love language. The best way to fill your spouse's love tank is to express love in their love language. Each of us has a primary love language. Usually, couples don't have the same love language.
Tank Check
Dr. Chapman recommends that you have a "Tank Check" 3 nights a week for 3 weeks. Ask one another "How is your love tank tonight?" If, on a scale from zero to ten, it is less than 10, then ask "What can I do to help fill it?" Then do it to the best of your ability.
The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman.
Dr. Gary Chapman, Christian counselor and author of The Five Love Languages (Compare Prices), writes about the importance of being able to express love to your spouse in a way that your spouse can understand. He calls this type of communicating using the five love languages.
Chapman's Five Emotional Love Languages:
Words of Affirmation
This is when you say how nice your spouse looks, or how great the dinner tasted. These words will also build your mate's self image and confidence.
Quality Time
Some spouses believe that being together, doing things together and focusing in on one another is the best way to show love. If this is your partner's love language, turn off the TV now and then and give one another some undivided attention.
Gifts
It is universal in human cultures to give gifts. They don't have to be expensive to send a powerful message of love. Spouses who forget a birthday or anniversary or who never give gifts to someone who truly enjoys gift giving will find themselves with a spouse who feels neglected and unloved.
Acts of Service
Discovering how you can best do something for your spouse will require time and creativity. These acts of service like vacuuming, hanging a bird feeder, planting a garden, etc., need to be done with joy in order to be perceived as a gift of love.
Physical Touch
Sometimes just stroking your spouse's back, holding hands, or a peck on the cheek will fulfill this need.
Determining Your Own Love Language
Since you may be speaking what you need, you can discover your own love language by asking yourself these questions:
How do I express love to others?
What do I complain about the most?
What do I request most often?
Speaking in your spouse's love language probably won't be natural for you. Dr. Chapman says, "We're not talking comfort. We're talking love. Love is something we do for someone else. So often couples love one another but they aren't connecting. They are sincere, but sincerity isn't enough."
Emotional Experiences
The number one emotional experience reported by folks is feeling the presence of God in their lives. The emotional high of being in love (which generally lasts around 2 years) is the second highest emotional experience that people reportedly have.
That is why it can be so difficult to try and talk some sense into someone who is in the midst of falling in love. Chapman stated that obsessive love can render people mentally incompetent. "There's not much difference between being in love and being insane."
Fading Tingle and Empty Love Tanks
After the first or second year of marriage, when the initial "tingle" is starting to fade, many couples find that their "love tanks" are empty. They may have been expressing love for their spouse, but in reality they may have been speaking a different love language. The best way to fill your spouse's love tank is to express love in their love language. Each of us has a primary love language. Usually, couples don't have the same love language.
Tank Check
Dr. Chapman recommends that you have a "Tank Check" 3 nights a week for 3 weeks. Ask one another "How is your love tank tonight?" If, on a scale from zero to ten, it is less than 10, then ask "What can I do to help fill it?" Then do it to the best of your ability.
The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
On Children by Kahlil Gibran
On Children
Kahlil Gibran
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Kahlil Gibran
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
less is more
After cancelling 3 of my schedules for two consecutive days it feels so liberating. I find it relaxing in cancelling those 3 seem-important thing in my to-do list. Less is more because it makes you more focus on the things that are really needed, not just your wants.
Having less in the center of your concern is more easy than anything, like having less unnecessary gadgets or things you think you want but it's not really needed in performing daily works, having less money makes you work on the essence of your budget. Furthermore, less clothes lessen the burden of dressing up every morning specially when you are in a hurry. Less expose in the limelight keeps you in touch of your true self.
Have you ever thought of keeping your life simple? Oh yes, less is more to your life!
Having less in the center of your concern is more easy than anything, like having less unnecessary gadgets or things you think you want but it's not really needed in performing daily works, having less money makes you work on the essence of your budget. Furthermore, less clothes lessen the burden of dressing up every morning specially when you are in a hurry. Less expose in the limelight keeps you in touch of your true self.
Have you ever thought of keeping your life simple? Oh yes, less is more to your life!
Sunday, January 29, 2012
To Focus
One of the goal I write in my 30 things I want in my life is to have the sense of focus, it's everybody tool in achieving goals while I set this as a goal. It's sounds funny but I have to have that kind of ability since I'm a big worrier and emotionally weak, I'm easily overwhelm by the things and experiences in my life, I don't know why but according to the book written by Rick Warren's The Purpose Driven Life explains that everything we experience since childhood is known to God and use it for His purpose. It could mean a stumble block that we can use to challenge us to be a good and new creation again or we can use this things in our own good and for God's purposes in our life. It's sounds rewarding in deed!
I have some links here to help us to achieve a focused life.
http://www.wikihow.com/Accomplish-a-Goal
http://www.lifeoptimizer.org/2011/03/18/how-to-stay-focused/
I have some links here to help us to achieve a focused life.
http://www.wikihow.com/Accomplish-a-Goal
http://www.lifeoptimizer.org/2011/03/18/how-to-stay-focused/
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